I heart White People...

This is kind of a "cheap" post, but I just had to post this blog forwarded to me from Josh:

http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.wordpress.com/

It's totally hilarious and it's good to know that White People are just as idiosyncratic and jacked up in the head as Chinese people are!

The Bagholders of HK

In the US, considerate men are expected to do certain things for women: wait for her to enter the door before them, pull out the chair for her when she sits at a table, open the car door for her to get in (apparently, even when you have keyless entry)...but in Hong Kong, the men there have clearly crossed the line - they handbag hold. I understand the aforementioned forms of modern chivalry - as a man, you want to appear to put the woman first, but wearing a woman's handbag is not only pointless but really emasculating. The handbag is an accessory, it's not the same as holding a shopping bag full of clothing so that your wife can free her hands to do more shopping, thus encumbering you more. No! The handbag makes a statement and in this case it says, "I'm a total tool." Why don't you wear her belt and ear rings while you're at it?

When I heard of this phenomenon, I didn't believe it. So I took my camera to Central and decided to do some big game hunting. Here's what I found.


From the back - and you wear it so well.









Oh, I know what's in your bag... your nuuuuuts.









Yes, hide your face in shame - that's quite the gold handbag you have there you fashionista, you.







I think this guy either: a) has his own bag, b) is carrying one of his girlfriend's two bags, or c) bought his own handbag and matched it to his girlfriend's. All three reasons are totally inexcusable.

Short Stay in Hong Kong

I had a short stay in HK on the way back to the States. Currently, I'm in one of my favorite places - the HK International Airport (yes, I'm a little weird). I have a couple posts that are in my mind, so I'll probably write them on the plane. In any case, here's the run down in HK.

Queen Mary Hospital - I spent roughly three-quarters of my trip sitting in the Queen Mary Hospital with my mom's godmother. She's 101 and passing away. On a positive note, I learned to take the light bus back and forth to Central...so now I really feel like a local.

Private Kitchen - Hong Kong is an island of status seekers and if you put Private in front of anything, it'll command a premium (e.g. Private sale, Private Equity, etc.). Anyhow, private kitchens are pretty big here - they help get around the restaurant laws, are difficult to find (they don't advertise and there's no signage), and they're really intimate (typically 2-4 tables). For Ter's birthday, we went to one that specializes in nouveau Shanghainese - and I wish I had my camera on me, but the food was pretty decent considering they're jazzing up old school dishes. Anyhow, I have the card and if anyone visits, I'd recommend the place - if not for the food, for the experience.

Walking and Shopping - I think I walked off the lechon I ate in the Philippines. Anyhow, the USD doesn't go as far here as it used to, even though it's pegged - prices are high. It's better to shop in the States, where everything is on sale!

Thanks to Ter for hosting and inviting me to hang out with him and his harem of girls. HK is clearly a great place to be a single!

The life of Pigs...

Pigs in the Philippines...

Pigs as pets - Rainbow, our cousin's pet mini Vietnamese pot belly pig (he's doing one of his tricks - laying down, but he can sit too).




Roast Pigs - Lechon, a fancy "cerimonial" pig.






Leftover Pig - paksiw na lechon, leftover Lechon in vinegar eaten with rice.





Pork...man's best friend and the other white meat.

I'm super proud to be Pinoy

My trip out here to the Philippines is quickly coming to an end, and I haven't gotten to post as much as I'd like. There's actually not all that much that have happened to us. Most of our days here are spent eating (they eat 5 meals a day here), sitting in traffic (they probably sit in traffic about 5 hours per day also), touring (which means, going to the malls), spending time with our cousins - who are super awesome (they use "super" as a superlative here), and going to mass.

We go to mass every day for this ritual called the novena. It culminates with a big party and lots of lechon (suckling pork). Most of the time, we have private mass, because it's mainly for the family of the deceased. Sunday mass is with the main congregration and it was on that day that I got to do a scripture reading in front of the Church. I botched the reading pretty good, skipped lines, cut off the response from the audience...suffice it to say, the Priest wasn't very pleased. At least I didn't bomb it like Vick did and call "A reading from Philippians", "A reading from the Philippines."

Let me see that Barong...Barong-ga-rong-rong-rong...

Apologies to Sisqo...but this song writes itself.

Last time I was back here (1998) - my cousins were all young and Vick and I were the "cool" cousins. Now, they're teenagers, we're in our 30s...and suddenly so uncool. Whateverz, we keeps it real.

Pics of Vick and me with the family... in our Barongs!!

The cousins...








The Aunts and Uncles...








B-Boy Style!

A 3am Eulogy...

A eulogy that I wrote at 3am - I'm not sure if I'm going to have to give it though, but in any case - I'm going to post it.

Thank you all for coming. I was asked to say a couple words on behalf of my Grandfather, who we all know and loved, and for whom, we are all here today to remember. I’ve heard some of the kind things that have been said by others and I’d just like to share a couple thoughts.

One of the Priests yesterday was talking about how generous Gong-Gong was with the grandkids – how he cared for us and how much he really enjoyed us. Growing up in LA, it meant that I got to see Gong Gong about once a year. As a kid, I would look forward to this day for weeks ahead – it was like Christmas and Santa was coming to town, except better.

First, Gong Gong was way better than Santa because he actually exists; he doesn’t wear a cheap furry red suit and a stocking hat with weak fuzzy white puff on the end of it. He wears a custom European one, with two Mont Blancs in the shirt pocket and a Rolex on his left wrist. He's all business.

Second, in my family, Santa didn’t get you the gift you really wanted – Santa got you the mother approved educational toy she thought you needed. Gong Gong was the man who would take you to the toy store and say: “Buy anything you want” and after negotiating with your mom over the legal definition of what “anything” really means, you’d end up with the Nintendo game you truly wanted – then spend 20 to 40 hours of your young life wasting away your brain playing Legend of Zelda. It was awesome.

Third, and this is why Gong Gong is the best, Gong Gong would let you do exactly the opposite of what your parents would allow you to do. As a kid, man – that’s the best! When Gong Gong came to town, it meant we were going to spend the night jumping on the beds at the Century Plaza Hotel (where our President stays when he visits LA) and ordering room service. Still to this day, the only time in my life where I've had room service is when Gong Gong came to town. For a child, Gong Gong was the closest thing to illegal drugs that you can get.

I think about these things now that I'm an adult – my fellow cousins have graciously pointed out that since I'm 31, I’m not nearly as young and cool as they are as teenagers (e.g. I can’t have a conversation, text my friend, and listen to my iPod at the same time) – and while I had lots of fun with Gong Gong, I think about what he really gave me aside from the gifts and the occasional ability to go nuts in front of my mom. So, here are the top three life lessons from Gong Gong that my mom nagged and lectured me about while growing up that I’d like to pass on to my cousins…And if anyone knows my mom, she can really nag and lecture better than any woman out there – she can give Hillary Clinton a run for her money. In anycase, here they are:

1. Stand up straight. My mom would constantly say: “Gong Gong says, when you stand up straight – you’re 2 inches taller.” If you ever knew Gong Gong, you knew he stood straight like a board. I thought mom would use this to remind us not to slouch – but I realize, when you’re older, it means completely different things. Right now, you guys are young – and you think you know almost everything in life there is to know. It’s only because, right now, in your lives – you know very little. Later in your life, when you’re meeting that important client, or presenting to the Board of Directors, or defending your doctoral thesis, or treating a patient and you realize that you’re not as smart as you used to be, just remember to stand up straight, move with certainty, and never give anyone the pleasure of taking you down.
2. Work hard, play hard. We all know Gong Gong worked pretty much up until the day he had to go to the hospital. But what you don’t know is that in Vegas, it’s nearly impossible to pry Gong Gong away from a slot machine. It doesn’t even have to be a dollar slot machine; he’s just as hard to get to stop playing the nickel slots too. Bring that same ethic you do to work that you do to play; it makes for a good life balance.
3. Blood is thicker than water. You don’t know many times I heard this growing up. My mom would say, “Gong Gong says: blood is thicker than water” whenever Vick and I would fight. To that I’d say, “Well, mud is thicker than blood.” Anyhow, this is pretty self explanatory – it’s the reason I’m standing here in front of you today, because as often as we forget it, blood is thicker than water.

Those are the lessons I have for my cousins, given to me from Gong Gong; I’m sorry this sounds more like a lecture, I really take after your “Gu Ma” sometimes. Lastly, if my brother is recording this to post to YouTube, I’m really going to have to rethink that last point.

Thank you all for coming.

Welcome Back...from the Dead

It's aliiivee...it's aliiivvve!!!!

I think I pick this thing up every year (all two of them) around this time - notably, before I leave the country. This time, I noticed that my original template's url has moved, so I had to rejigger this backup one. One of these days, I'll re-code it and host it myself, but for now, I'm using this one - shout out to Oinam for cranking this out.

Anyhow - I'm headed to Philippines tomorrow. I wish it were for different reasons, but mainly, it's because Gong Gong has passed away. His story is amazing, one day I may write about it - but for now, I'll just say he was the one who taught us to hold our heads up high. "It's always important to stand up straight, you look like you're two inches taller" - for those of us who are a towering 5"6", we need all the extra inches we can get.

I guess - for you, and me, I'll summarize the latter half of the year:

• Green Street's going well - my guys got promoted, worked hard, added a girl to the team (managing a girl is completely different). We're opening up a London office, expanding International, and still hiring people.

• All my stock ideas posted on this blog suck - don't follow any of them, you'll be poor. The only decent recommendation I've made was NHP for Josh and he's done quite well. As for me, I own BRK because I want to have his baby (and because I lack ideas) and I've recently shorted the Russell 2000 to pair my BRK holdings. The day after I shorted, I lost 8%. I have about 8% more to go before I feel screwed and bail out; every day, I'm praying for bad economic data. I could really use another USG, but then, my ego would be huge.

• Girls - I dated a couple (I can actually say a couple!), went on my first blind date that was horribly wonderful. Others, I've horribly bungled. Let's just say if dating was a Choose Your Own Adventure book, I'd be dead at page 2 - and no, you can't use your finger as a bookmark in case you want to undo your last move.

• Family - mom has cancer, it's scary the third time around because of the realization that it's gonna be around a while. There is no cure, you just "manage" it till the next time.

That's the big stuff, I suppose - I'm lighter in the portfolio, have more obligations, and can't necessarily see the light at end of the tunnel. But, that's life and if I have to walk that path - I may as well do it two inches taller.